Triggers Are a Gift — Why You Won’t Find Warnings on My Writing

In all my writing over the past decade, I never once stopped to think about including a trigger warning.

A trigger warning is a statement that appears before the start of an article, blog, email, book, social post, or paragraph intended to warn a reader of potential traumatic triggers included inside.

From Wikipedia:

“A trauma trigger is a psychological stimulus that prompts involuntary recall of a previous traumatic experience. The stimulus itself need not be frightening or traumatic and may be only indirectly or superficially reminiscent of an earlier traumatic incident, such as a scent or a piece of clothing. Triggers can be subtle, individual, and difficult for others to predict. A trauma trigger may also be called a trauma stimulus, a trauma stressor or a trauma reminder.” Wikipedia

I started digging into this topic when I was finalizing edits to my book, Intuitive Writing. 

My book is about… writing. Inside, I share stories from people who experienced creative blocks and found their way through them. One powerful story from Malana Hokulani discussed how she went mute when she was just 11 when images of her childhood abuse came to her. She wouldn't make sense of it all until she was in her 30s. Of the handful of stories in the book, I received the most feedback about Malana’s. They found it incredibly powerful and moving.

One beta reader said the story triggered her and suggested that I include a trigger warning ahead of this story.

It gave me pause. My initial intuitive instinct was a strong no. Since this was new territory for me, I asked several people about adding a trigger warning. I asked professional book editors, ghostwriters, fellow writers, trusted groups and business friends, and even someone whose daughter was struggling with mental health issues. 

Wanting advice from someone outside my online business world and the book publishing arena, I asked my husband, a very vocal, sweary New Yorker. I knew what his answer would be. You can probably guess the words that came out of his mouth. It prompted a deeper discussion, though, and he shared that triggers just happen — and he’s aware of them. 

I had seen some trigger warnings included in some online articles and books. But more often than not, the writing is just there. It’s there for all of us to read. No label, just a collection of words there for me to read. 

Now, content warnings, on the other hand, are different. I wouldn’t take little kids to an R-rated movie. Like content you shouldn’t open at work because of graphics. And like anything I consume, I look at it to see if I want to consume it and practice discernment.

My instinct was spot on. Everyone I talked to, including those in the publishing world, said …

NO! Don't include a trigger warning.

I decided not to put a trigger warning on any of my writing and let my writing shine freely.

Here’s why:

Triggers are a GOOD thing. When we’re triggered, it means there’s something coming up for us that needs to be looked at so it can be healed. 

Through my discussions and deeper reflection, I’ve come up with some additional reasons why I’ll let my words stand tall and skip the warnings.

• My own writing triggered me. I was triggered when writing my first book, Unfussy Life. Two parts memoir, one part self-development, I uncovered things that happened to me as a kid. It had been bubbling under the surface for years, but it started coming into focus (and still would take a few more years of work to see it). I was also triggered when writing about affairs, divorce, my dad moving out when I was 15, and the death of my grandparents. All these triggers were a blessing because I could see where I needed to go deeper into my own healing.
  
  Intuitive Writing Tip: If triggers arise while you’re writing — go slow, give yourself space, write morning pages, and instead of stuffing a trigger down, numbing, or lashing out, explore and heal it energetically (for this level of healing, at an energetic level, I recommend Liana Shanti’s programs).

• The whole world is a freaking trigger! Imagine if there were trigger warnings on couples fighting in public, moms smacking their kids at the grocery store, a man striking his dog, freezers full of dead, tortured animals at the grocery store, the corner lined with homeless people, smells, sights, sounds, emotions. Triggers are everywhere, and there’s no way to know what will trigger us or a reader.

• My book about writing is a pretty light topic. Most people who read my book have many comforts — reading it in a cozy chair with stacks of notebooks nearby and a hot cup of tea. The contents of just about any book could be a trigger for someone. In my book, the section on green smoothies triggered someone into writing a 1-star review, proving that even fruits and veggies can be triggery for those who have some healing to do.

• Someone’s mere presence can be triggering. As someone who’s doing healing work, my words, actions, and even presence have, at times, proven to be like a flashlight. People get uncomfortable because it’s a bright light illuminating the things they want to avoid looking at. Should people speaking who are truth verbalize a warning every time they open their mouths? Better cover this up and add a warning in case it bothers someone.

• What does a trigger warning do if someone wants to continue reading? How does someone “mentally prepare?” Do they light a candle, clench their jaw, and read with a hand over their eyes, peeking between their fingers? What purpose will it serve? What if I read it and I’m not triggered? Then, I was so focused on looking for something to be uncomfortable with that I didn’t get what I needed. And the warning labels may not work at all. Trigger warnings don’t seem to affect most people’s emotional responses to content. Psychology Today.

• Warnings could cause more harm than good. They could be doing nothing at all, in which case, why would one want to add them to a piece of writing? Harvard researchers found that reading trigger warnings caused participants to rank themselves and others as more vulnerable to developing PTSD. Psychology Today.

• I don’t expect anyone to alter their message for me. I didn’t grow up with trigger warnings, and I never expected anyone to change their message in case I’d be bothered by it. I got triggered and dealt with it. Sometimes in not-so-healthy ways. I still get triggered at times, and because I’m okay with getting uncomfortable and looking, I can move through it now with awareness. A trigger is valuable information for me to look at something I wasn’t aware of or may have been sidestepping.

• Trigger readings read like watery soup. Whenever I’ve read content with a trigger warning, it never deterred me from reading. What the trigger warning did tell me was that the author was afraid of criticism and probably people-pleasing. People-pleasing tendencies are a significant area of work for me, so I can spot them miles away. 

I’ve seen trigger warnings in books and articles that left me scratching my head. Confused, I was distracted while reading to decipher what exactly could be triggering. Are those who are afraid to speak or get canceled (with blocked throat chakras) going to blanket put trigger warnings on everything they write? You know — just in case. 

Do you want to read writing from writers who are writing to perform, please, or avoid disapproval?

Or would you prefer to read something authentic, honest, and real?

I prefer to read the latter.

And if you ever find yourself triggered, use the opportunity to dive deeper into your healing work. If you experienced trauma or were a victim, then I am truly sorry. That should never have to happen to anyone. 🙏 Whatever you’ve navigated, there’s no greater gift than looking where it may be painful and uncomfortable to look, doing the work, and truly healing.

Dropping the censors — advice on writing (and sharing) from a surrendered place…

Watch the workshop: Uncensored: Write Authentically, Share Freely, and Connect Consciously.