10 Lessons From Being Laid Off 3 Times in 5 Years
I’ve been laid off 3 times in 5 years. Ouch, right? It only hurt the first time. You might be surprised to hear how I handled it the second and third times.
If you’re reading this because you were just laid-off, downsized, right-sized, or reorganized, I feel you. It sucks at first. And through these experiences, I’ve discovered there’s a huge opportunity and gift in the lessons.
I’m not going to mess around here — let’s jump right to the good stuff.
Layoff #1 – July 2009
I’d been working for a Chicago-based management consulting firm for five years on big US and state Government projects. I had just returned to work following a paid 4-month maternity leave around the time Obama took office. Government spending on contractors was cut, and the company lost a few important projects.
I had no idea what to expect when my Managing Director called me into his office shortly after lunch. When I got to his office, there was some other dude in there, who I learned was from HR. I was a deer in headlights and was in total shock for the next 15 minutes and the following weeks.
I returned to my desk, stunned. They told me to take my time and gather my things. I later came to appreciate how they let me do this with grace and dignity. Unlike layoff number two. I gathered everything I could fit in my bag and tossed the rest. I didn’t say goodbye to anyone. I sent a few emails to let some of my friends and coworkers know and booked it out of there on the next train. I held my shit together until I got home. I didn’t pick up my son from daycare yet because I needed to process this business first. I fell apart in a ball of snotty, ugly crying mess on the floor. I felt like such a loser. I was angry, “Why me?”— I wished I’d quit first.
Layoff #2 – August 2012
After the first layoff, my husband, a 1-year-old son, and I moved to Canada. I’m from the Toronto area, and hubby is from New York. I figured we have a baby now; we should live closer to my family. Always up for an adventure, instead of looking for jobs in Chicago, I looked in Toronto instead. I landed a job in Crisis Communications at BlackBerry pretty quickly and worked there for three years. During this time, I birthed another baby, a daughter, and a few months after returning from maternity leave, guess what happened? Since BlackBerry is a high-profile company, there were news trucks outside on days when layoffs were happening.
I knew it was my day. I had packed my personal laptop and a spare BlackBerry, and that morning, I told everyone, “If we get shit-canned today, I’ll meet you at Starbucks.” Sadly, a bunch of them met me there.
When a Director came to our desks and called two of us to follow him, I knew it was happening. We wiped our phones while trodding along behind him. When we landed in a conference room with a bunch of envelopes on the table, I knew what was up. I’ve done this before. It’s like getting on a bike for your second time, but not quite as cool. My coworker I was with was crying, but I was stone-faced, “How much is severance?” Our manager was apologizing on the way out of the door, and he was stunned when, instead, I apologized to him. I told him I couldn’t imagine being in his position today and wished him a better rest of the day.
My husband had an opportunity at a Chicago start-up and had been traveling back and forth from Chicago to Toronto when I was let go from BlackBerry. That layoff was the trigger to put the rest of our plan in motion. I called my old boss to see what was new. “Oh, we just won some massive contracts; when can you come back?”
Me: “Give me a month.” No joke — we sold our home for a tidy profit, found a place in Chicago, hired a nanny, and made an international move in four weeks. We don’t mess around.
Layoff #3 – May 2014
At first, it was a little weird being back at the place I was let go from in 2009. Until the rest of the team was hired back, too — then it was like the old days. We had big government work, this time thanks to some more big government projects, and life was good. Up until we lost a few big contracts (again), and they let the whole team go, and then some — again.
I knew it was likely, and I had been looking for another job. For a few years, I’d been toying with the idea of building my OWN business — because, seriously, I want the next time to be on my terms.
When I received a 2:10 pm meeting invitation on a Tuesday (layoffs are almost always on a Monday or Tuesday) from a Managing Director I hardly spoke with and arrived in the conference room to see the somber faces, I literally laughed out loud. I told them to stop explaining — I knew the drill. I asked, “How much is severance, and when is it paid?” They looked at me like I was crazy.
Instead of being upset about being laid off, I felt free.
On the way home, I stopped at the grocery store and bought an expensive bottle of wine, some good salty dark chocolate, and flowers. I actually skipped.
Now, the important lessons:
Honor the emotions. Feel the emotions that are coming up. Let yourself feel them fully, and then move into Get Shit Done (GSD) mode and contact everyone you know.
Look for another job IMMEDIATELY. Even if you have four months of severance pay, that’s roughly how long it was from pink slip to new employee orientation at a new job every time.
Apply for unemployment insurance IMMEDIATELY. We pay for it, after all, and you need to apply right away because it takes a while to kick in. Don’t feel weird about it; just do it.
Enjoy it. Especially if you have severance pay. I enjoyed the unexpected extra time with my kids. I think it was God’s way of giving me a longer maternity leave, the time my kids actually needed.
Start a side-hustle. If you get your pink slip, your side hustle could become your full-time income, or it could help you build your savings account and save your ass when the time comes. I did NOT do this in advance, and I wish I had. This way, if you find yourself jobless, you can have enough momentum going on the side that you can quickly sweep in and shift your focus while keeping your bank account healthy.
Know that it’s not personal. In big layoffs, it comes down to a percentage on a spreadsheet. You’re a number to a large company. It’s not personal, so don’t take it as such.
No one is layoff-proof. This deserves repeating. NO ONE IS LAYOFF PROOF. You can be extremely valuable and well-liked, but it all comes down to a percentage on a spreadsheet. The old school thinking of getting a job and working there until you die is dead.
There’s no such thing as job security. When people say their job offers them “stability,” I completely disagree. It provides you with a routine and a paycheck — until it doesn’t.
Always be prepared for a layoff. Have a plan that includes a budget that is pre and post-layoff. Outline what subscriptions and services you’ll cancel the moment the “trigger” is pulled. This also means your LinkedIn profile and resume should ALWAYS be ready. Here are some tips for crafting a standout headline.
Your job is not you. When we use a job to define us, the blow hurts when we lose it. If you’re not identifying yourself and basing your self-worth on your job, you won’t feel like a piece of you was lost when you lose your job. This ego-eradication work is deep healing work. I’m still on the path, and it’s worth it.
When layoffs happen, trust that a better, more aligned something is on its way.
Layoffs happen for a reason. It’s the universe’s way of offering you a better opportunity, pointing you in a different direction — and hopefully giving you a severance package while you figure it out.
I left my last job on my terms in 2017 when I decided it was time.
Thinking of starting your own business or side-hustle? Grab the exact emails I used to start, and grow my writing business.
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